Fall commencement speaker shares story of resilience

Graduating NDSU student Wendi Wheeler has a powerful message for her fellow graduates: you can do anything you set your mind to.

Wheeler, who will be graduating with a master’s degree in counselor education, was selected as the student representative for the 2 p.m. ceremony on Friday, Dec. 19. The ceremony is for graduates in the College of Arts and Sciences, College of Health and Human Sciences and Interdisciplinary Studies.

In her speech, Wheeler outlines her journey at NDSU starting back in 1989 when she was pursuing her bachelor’s degree.

“I was 18 years old, a bright-eyed small-town girl who was so excited to be a college student in the big city,” Wheeler recalls in her speech.

“In the summer between my freshman and sophomore years, I had one of the most formative experiences of my life: I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy and made the decision to place him for adoption. It was an overwhelmingly positive experience, but I struggled after his birth, and I never returned to school full-time,” she said.

Wheeler remembers the day she walked across 12^th Avenue, leaving campus for what she thought would be the last time.

Despite the setbacks to getting her degree, Wheeler’s speech is one of resilience and rewriting your story.

“I hope students and guests will take away the hope that comes from knowing our mistakes don’t need to define us forever. Even when we can’t see it, there is the possibility that we will have a chance to start over and write a new ending to our story,” Wheeler said. “I would love to know that someone who hears my message finds the courage to go back to school or to start, even if they’re older than the average student.”

After leaving NDSU, Wheeler moved to Minneapolis, Minnesota, where she graduated summa cum laude with her bachelor’s degree in communication and women's studies at 36. She was the first in her family to earn a college degree and remembers her graduation day as being “one of the best days of my life,” she said.

When Wheeler moved back to Fargo four years ago, a friend recommended she apply to graduate school to work toward a degree in counseling.

“When my friend asked me if I had thought about becoming a counselor, I was going through one of the most severe mental health challenges of my life. So, I laughed when he asked because I thought I was too unwell to help other people. But he was so supportive and encouraging, and so was everyone in the Graduate Admissions Office at NDSU,” she said. “Through my program, I have come to see my past experiences as a source of strength because they mean I can understand and empathize with clients, especially around some of the topics that are more difficult to discuss.”

The day Wheeler returned to campus is one she remembers fondly, as it marked the moment when she had the chance to finish what she had started.

“Just like the day I left NDSU, I will never forget the warm autumn day when I came back. I crossed 12^th Avenue and stopped at the NDSU letters stamped into the sidewalk outside the library, and I took a picture to post on Instagram. I never imagined I would return to NDSU, not to attend grad school, and certainly not at the age of 51,” Wheeler writes.

The faculty in NDSU’s counselor of education program has been supportive throughout her entire journey, Wheeler said. Wheeler credits her advisor, Jessica Danielson, an associate professor and clinic coordinator in human development and family science, as being one of her biggest supporters along the way.

“Learning to become a counselor is extremely challenging and rewarding, so having support from faculty and your cohort is important,” she said. “I think prospective students should choose the counselor education program at NDSU because they will be supported every step of the way by faculty who have outstanding professional experience and who genuinely care about their students.”

Among some of her favorite memories of NDSU have been bonding with others in her program’s cohort and participating in the department’s hooding ceremony in the spring.

Now, having come full circle in her time at NDSU, Wheeler’s words of encouragement to her fellow graduates are to cherish the moment and to leap into the life they’ve been hoping for.

Wheeler is excited to have her mom, Pat, siblings Megan, Kari and Lucas, as well as her birth son, Mark, his wife, Megan, and their children, Theo and Lucy, attend the commencement ceremony to celebrate her achievements.